AJ Alanson Author

My husband, Grammie, and myself have faithfully walked, driven, and waited for busses with this incredible mid-life surprise as she entered preschool, kindergarten, grade school, middle school, and high school. Today, 13 years of school day doting ends. True, we can drive her college if she stays local, but she won’t. Last fall, she applied for a posting as youth ambassador to Germany and got it. Starting in August, and for a year, she belongs to the state department. THIS state department. Yeah…there’s that.

Europe has enjoyed a long peace until recently and very recently, being an American has, shall we say, lost it’s luster. So, close to a war zone and carrying the mantle of idiocy she didn’t earn, she was asked in her last interview why she wanted this. She said, “Because I’m not an ass.” While everyone raised an eyebrow to her answer, she went on to explain, “A leader of a country can come in and screw up everything but the next leader can’t simply fix it. It’s up to the people to make amends, to show that we aren’t assholes.”

I wanted to cry, “Why does it have to be my daughter?” But I know she’s right. All of us need to NOT be assholes and even if her parents hadn’t taught her that, the world has. Manners maketh man. Meanness maketh monsters.

Just recently, she gently admitted to us she doesn’t intend to return to American universities. She’s hoping to be accepted somewhere in Europe. Do you blame her? Besides the crazy goings-on with American schools, she doesn’t want to watch the rest of the puppet theatre around this country either. This is not to say Europe doesn’t have ridiculous political circuses, but they aren’t HER clowns.

A year ago, we wouldn’t have doubted whether she’d get on that plane, wondered if the state department would explode from empty heads swelling behind too much botox, or worried whether she’d get back into the country, or even if she, a brilliant, beautiful, and empowered young woman, would want to come back. Now, the cost of both complacency AND complicity in the face of criminality has reached into my household to a must greater extent than a dozen eggs.

Congratulations, Ava, for watching the world and charting the best path for you. I’m in awe of your bravery, strength and wisdom, but most of all, your clarity. Sadly, parking yourself over in a potential war zone seems safer for a university-age, young, beautiful woman with brains than staying home. Love, Mom.